When Past dominates the Present..

why can't someone come out of their past? You have got only one life to live...whatever has to happen will happen here. Good, bad, success, failure....everything....in this life only.....Something which happened in the past should not affect the present or the future. Of course, there are learning’s that you take from your past but that doesn't mean you will apply the same to your present. You can't compare things based on past data. Everyone is unique and different. There may be things which two people do or say the same way but that does not mean they are made of the same stuff. If you try to map everything with your past then it will hurt you for a longer time. You want to say or do something but you can not do it because you will start justifying things according to your past. You can not enjoy your present. You think you have a problem. You think this is destiny.
Not correct. This is not true. These things come out because people do not want to accept things. "No.....I will not accept. why me? why me?...I am good...I never did anything wrong...I was 100% devoted...then why me??? why this happened to me.......I wanted something and i did not get that and now I am getting something but why should I take it......I have a problem......things may repeat itself....no..no......If i want something then I want what I want....not that I am getting........I will live in my past and If I try to live my present to the fullest then that would be crime because how can I be happy? I can''t be happy because nothing happened what i wanted...let me be sad......this is the way people should be...and i m right.....at least i will take some years to come over what happened
in the past....I don't deserve good things....I don't deserve good friends.....I should not say what i
want.....".................................................................................................................................

All negative........

It depends on an individual what sort of life he/she wants....there is nothing like I deserve this or I deserve that...no..no......life is the way you want to be........so one should try to be happy....try to express oneself as far as one can.........if you don't like something be straight forward...this is the mantra of leading a happy life.........and again the bottom line is .......you have 1 life to live............choice is yours..........traffic light counter doesn't wait.....it goes green...............or it goes red.........................so what I feel...there is no time frame for anything.......i will say this on that day....i will do this after sometime..........do it what you want...when you want.........love your life.................cheers :)

Mood swings in longer discussions.....

When a longer discussion is ongoing, there are times when confidence level becomes very high and at that time one of the partners says something which is not justified in the current situation. This is because of over confidence generated during the process. Actually speaking, intentions remain clear, but meanings differ and that causes a wrong impression in the minds of the other partner. This also depends on the human behavior of the person to some extent. The moment you think that I have to keep my partner happy, problem ceases to exist. You never see any problem. when issues are raised, you look for solutions rather then showing discomfort. Having this mind frame is not easy, it
is very difficult for anyone to keep thinking about happiness of the other person. People say they are able to do it, but not able to sustain the same behavior for a longer duration. The self can not hide itself behind walls for a longer period of time. When self starts playing its role then meanings change. what is being said and what is being interpreted suddenly changes. Mood swings and at the end there is only one winner: self. so now the question is how to kill this self bug? bottom line is "you can not kill the self bug". You can only hide it as long as you want. So, how to keep the self behind bars for a longer duration? I am able to identify some parameters which can keep on increasing the jurisdiction period of self. These are Faith, Trust, soft spoken, acceptance, believe, respect, truth & moral values. If someone can keep a guard on these parameters in any situation then self can not malign the intentions. when in doubt:

check Faith and say.....Do I have 100% faith?
check Trust and say.....Do I have 100% trust?
check that are u still soft spoken?
check acceptance and say.....Do I have 100% Acceptance?
check belief and say.....Do I still believe 100%?
check respect and say.....Do I still have 100% respect?
check truth and say.....Do I still see 100% truth?
check moral and say.....Do I still see moral values in place?

when any parameter does not meet 100% criteria then take a pause...think again.....and you will realize that something is wrong & you can correct yourself at that point.

Wow!!! cool.....I never thought I can write such stuffs.....I hope this will help me in my future conversations.